So I got back from Barney today. The trip was great, especially with Sam there. She made it a really special trip. She was a kindergarten counselor for some of the girls who went four years ago, and now they are in third grade getting close to be done at Camp Chai and to go off to sleep away camp 🙁
Anyways, went over to my friend’s pool with friends tonight and it was a fun time. Then me and Reuben drove over to CVS before I dropped him off and the Japanese lady was there again and once again asked for my number twice for the CVS cards. Her accent is really strong and reminds both of us of the guy from “City Wok” on South Park.
On the way home from dropping off Reuben my iPod turned on to the song Under Pressure and it made me think of the movie “The Girl Next Door”.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3iUnyRqYQg&hl=en&fs=1&border=1]
The movie makes me think of what is going on for me. My life was going fine, but this summer has really put a Monkey Wrench into my plans. Things haven’t changed much, but there is definitely a little frustration in the fact that I don’t really know where I am going. I thought that I knew everything, but the more I learn, the less I feel like I really know. It seems like as soon as you know where the world is taking you, everything changes. I like consistency, routine, stability, having a plan, and going about things logical. The problem is that any route I take could be logical, but I am worried about what sort of impact I will have. Are you ever in that mood where you wonder how your actions will impact the world? People have me thinking about my future more and more. Will I cause change that impacts all or only a few? Will my actions be felt by crowds, or only those who surround me? Will I be poor or rich? Will I be well educated or will my mind be untrained.
At a time like this, I think of the Torah, I think of g-d, I think of my family, and I think of those who have impacted me. I’m not entirely sure the decision is up to me. I used to ask myself if I would be successful in what I do, and the more I ask myself, the more comfortable I feel with saying yes. Instead today, I am asking if I will love it. My passion for everything, from my job as a camp counselor to my work with Student Government is fueled by my love for the world and the results I see. I refuse to sit idly by, but I also know that sometimes it is important to let things go on their own.
As my blog readers, I invite all of you to think to yourselves about what you do. Does it make you happy? Is it what g-d would want you to do? Does it provide a necessary service? Most importantly, do you love it and do it with a lot of passion. Without passion, work is bland and boring, but with it, it is beautiful. Without putting everything into what you are doing, you can cheat yourself and the world, so I encourage all of you to keep working, no matter how big the challenge, but always know when to ask for help. I know I’ll always be there if you need me.
Ross